Definition of a Virgin

January 10, 2011 at 2:37 pm 1 comment

I did a guest blog on and people were really interested in the term Virgin.  The main reason I used this term was my choices, based on other people’s references to this archetype, were Princess, Maiden or Virgin.  Since I’m making the point that this archetype refers to males and females equally (we all have a masculine and a feminine side), Virgin seemed the only term that would work.  I don’t know any men who would admit to being on a Princess journey.  (While I’m on the subject, when I say she or her I mean s/he or her/him.  I default to the feminine for Virgin archetypes and the masculine for Hero archetypes but both are implied.)

I  found the term works really well.  Exploring the historical use of the term Virgin gave me insights into the archetype.  For instance, first I learned it means ‘of intrinsic value’ as in a Virgin forest.  The Virgin’s journey is to look inside herself and see her authentic nature and bring it to life, despite what everyone else thinks she should do with her life.  This definition really worked for me.

Another definition is that she is ‘a woman unto herself’ or as I like to say ‘a person unto oneself’.  This captures the goal of knowing yourself and being yourself despite the demands around you.  This is what she must do as there will always be many emotional pulls around her.  She is on a journey to know her values and trust that out of the chaos this brings, life will organize itself around this way of being. Greek goddesses that were described as Virgins were said to own their own values.  This meant they could choose who they were going to have sex with or not have sex with.  They did not let societal expectation control them.  I love the contrast between this definition from M. Esther Harding’s Women’s Mysteries and patriarchal definitions.

Patriarchy defines Virginity as inexperienced sexually which gives a man confidence he was not being compared to another and his children were from his sperm.  In actuality the patriarchal Virgin is a Victim archetype as she does not control her own values.  So, in my small way, I am trying to reclaim the original definitions of Virgin and add it to the mix.

Entry filed under: Archetype theory. Tags: , , , , .

Black Swan is a creepy Virgin story Virgin Intro –

1 Comment Add your own

  • 1. Lorne A  |  January 10, 2011 at 3:45 pm

    Kim: Thanks for clarifying your choice of the Virgin as the name for the archetype you write about. While it makes eminent sense, especially when situated in a historical context, it is unfortunate that the word “virgin” has a relatively fixed and limited meaning in contemporary culture. Muddying the waters further is the fact that the word “virgin” is invariably applied if not strictly but almost always to females (the movie of about the 40 year male version notwithstanding!).
    I wanted to know if you have done any reading about the concept of “differentiation”, a term used to describe the balance between being true to one’s own values while simultaneously committing to a relationship. I’m asking because it seems to me that that is what the Virgin’s Promise is all about, i.e. adhering to his/her own inner values and still remaining engaged with the “community” be it family, partner or the broader society (“Bend it Like Beckham”, “Billy Elliot” and so many other films you dissect in your book.
    I may be off base with this, but I’d really like your perspective.
    Thanks again, Kim – keep up the insightful work!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Trackback this post  |  Subscribe to the comments via RSS Feed

Share this blog

Bookmark and Share
<!-- AddThis Button END -

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 366 other followers


The Virgin’s Promise

Writing Feminine Stories of Creative, spiritual and Sexual Awakening

Books Available at Michael Wiese Productions and Amazon

Go to

Top Rated

%d bloggers like this: